Rejection: What It Feels Like and How to Move Past It

Rejection is one of the most universal yet deeply personal experiences we encounter as human beings. Whether it's a job you didn’t get, a relationship that ended, or a friend who grew distant, rejection stings. It touches that vulnerable part of us that longs to belong, to be chosen, to be seen as enough.

What Rejection Feels Like

Rejection can feel like a punch to the gut — sudden, sharp, and disorienting. It often brings an overwhelming mix of emotions: sadness, confusion, anger, shame, or even numbness. Some describe it as a physical ache, like your heart is actually hurting. For others, it’s the mental replay that’s the hardest — running over conversations, wondering what went wrong, or obsessing over what you could’ve done differently.

It can also hit your self-esteem like a wrecking ball. You start questioning your worth, your abilities, or your attractiveness. You might tell yourself stories like “I’m not good enough” or “I’ll never succeed,” and those narratives, if left unchecked, can stick around long after the rejection itself has passed.

What Rejection Looks Like

Rejection isn’t always dramatic. Sometimes it’s subtle — a text left on “read,” a project passed over, or silence when you expected support. Other times, it's clear and loud: a breakup conversation, a job denial email, or a canceled opportunity. Regardless of how it shows up, rejection often causes us to internalize the experience. We interpret it as a statement about who we are, rather than recognizing it for what it really is — a moment, not a definition.

How to Move Past Rejection

Moving past rejection takes intention, patience, and a good dose of self-compassion. Here’s how to begin:

Feel it fully. Don’t rush to brush it off. Give yourself permission to feel hurt, disappointed, or angry. Suppressed feelings tend to find other ways to resurface later. Acknowledge the pain without judgment it’s okay to hurt.

Challenge the story. Ask yourself: what am I telling myself about this rejection? Is it really true, or am I letting this one moment define me? Often, rejection says more about the other person’s preferences, timing, or needs than it does about your worth.

Reframe it. Every rejection is also a redirection. Sometimes, the closed door is actually guiding you to something more aligned, whether it's a better job, a healthier relationship, or a deeper understanding of yourself.

Take the lesson. Instead of seeing rejection as failure, see it as feedback. What can you learn? How can this make you stronger, wiser, more resilient?

Keep showing up. Rejection can make you want to hide, but growth lives in trying again. Trust that your value isn’t diminished by one “no” — or even a dozen. Your worth is inherent.

Rejection hurts, but it doesn’t have to define you. Let it be a stepping stone, not a stopping point. The more you face it with honesty and grace, the more resilient and confident you become.

Sometimes we have cords that need to be released from old relationships. To learn more about cords, karmics, soulmates, and how to move forward please book a session with me and lets get you to where you want to be. www.ashleysteen.com